When I first met my wife I got quite a shock (as she is such a beauty obvs.). And when we moved in together and began to share a bed I got another shock but a bit less of one this time. Every morning after I left our bedroom, she …
Read the rest >>>

Night Moves

Dreams can come true

Gabrielle, summer of 1993

This week both boys have been ill. Which is a new thing for us. One yes, two never. Never again hopefully.

The baby, M, has got a cough and a bit of a cold and TBH is bossing his way through it. …
Read the rest >>>


Today as we passed the local beach I was happy to see that the waves were complete shit and by this I mean they were so shit that even I – a crowd-hater of British surfing heritage who would rather surf complete slop aloneish than good waves with anyone else …
Read the rest >>>

Priorities of Care

‘I’m not grumpy,’ she hisses.
‘My mistake,’ I say.

I am astride the porcelain throne flipping idly through apps on my phone. All was quiet when I began but now I can hear something. In truth, I finished my business a while ago but I have decided to take a …
Read the rest >>>

Dummy Versus Hand

He’s crying so hard that I can’t believe he isn’t going to have an aneurysm. We can’t believe he isn’t going to have an aneurysm. It’s we because we’ve been doing shifts to calm this little bomb down for the past hour or so. I’ve actually had a break – …
Read the rest >>>

Missed Kiss

The other day our newborn son, M and I were in the street outside our apartment block preparing for a nice walk. It seemed, however, as if M wasn’t quite ready to go and he explained this to me by going very red and shouting like fuck. I picked him …
Read the rest >>>


Today I got shat on. Twice. Not metaphorically. First by the 12 day old. He tricked me by peeing on me first, which made me lower my guard, then he let me have it with a stream of the stuff. We were on the sofa. It’s dark grey so fluorescent …
Read the rest >>>

Paternity Leave (no. 2) Day 8

We lay awake most of the night afraid that M wasn’t waking up to feed. Ha ha as come the morning he hungrily went at the royal boobs and happily filled himself up. We’re getting sleep so there must be something wrong! That said, S had brought home his second …
Read the rest >>>

Paternity Leave (no. 2) Day 7

Today we went to buy a pram. That should read, another pram. Our spare room (warehouse) now resembles a closing down sale at Mothercare. Shabby miniature wheeled vehicles stand around redundantish as S walks mostly everywhere now. The new pram, which is actually second hand, fits right in with the …
Read the rest >>>